The Dotted Line

I was resting under a willow in the land of make believe, it was sunset.  The sky was exploding with beautiful colors which filled my heart, spirit, and soul which such joy. 

To my surprise, the coyote came to me and, "my darling dear, do not sign the dotted line, unless you write the dots,".

I blinked and he was gone, I smiled. Unless I write the dots?

This crazy yet calm, stormy yet peaceful, energetic yet tranquil place of make believe, is a sanctuary, I place just for me.  For my heart, spirit, and soul to rest. I write the dots here. Somehow the coyote was able to scribe himself in.

Only friends are allowed in this place of make believe, I smile because, no one has ever had the will strong enough to enter these pages without my will.

This land of pink trees, beautiful, gentle hills, filled with forests full of willow trees which are home to many creatures, has only known my words, words written by my hand, and only my hand.

I never would have allowed the coyote here not by my hand, and yet he was here.

It is sprinkling, the type of sprinkle right before a storm ends. Yes, even in this place of make believe it can sprinkle.  What lovely sprinkles they are.

Acceptance of Oneself

Acceptance of oneself, and ones limitations can be the hardest. At least that is what I have found.

Ofcourse in the land of make believe, everything is just right, just how we are and our physical limitations are non-existence.

The sky this morning in make believe was pink, lavender, baby blues, and soft mints.  Such a wonderful and beautiful sky.

I am grateful.

Working With What You Have

Learning to work with what you have is a life lesson which transfer from the land of make believe to reality.  Or maybe it is the other way around.

We can only make choices with the information we have.  Sometimes we do not have all the information and we are aware of that.  Yet we still have no choice but to make decisions on what we do have.

Such is life; in the land of make believe and in reality.

Acceptance Of Who You Are

What a beautiful land, this world of make believe.  Here, you are accepted as who you are today.  Not how you were in the past or how you will be on the future.

In the path to the rivers by the pink trees, you will never cross the path of someone telling you are broken. 

It is beautiful to walk between the pink trees, and peaceful.  How peaceful it is.

I will not allow someone to tell me I am broken under the excuse that they did not suceed in their attempts of molding me into who they think I should be.

I am who I am. You are who you are. My physical body may be weak, bit my heart, soul, and spirit are strong.
I rather be physically weak and spiritually strong than the other way.

I realized that this morning, while I was walking in between the pink trees on my way to the blue rivers in the land of make believe.  My heart, soul, and spirit are strong. I have much to give and to do still.  I will not let anyone take that away from me.

I am grateful.

You Will Never Hear

You will never hear in the land of make believe, "I have no room for you."

In between the fields and butterflies, by the rivers and the sunrise, there is always room.

There will always be enough space for the land of make believe grows as we all grow. Grow in faith, hope, and joy. 

You will always be welcome and no one will ever tell you, you are too broken.  You will be accepted as you are.  You will be loved as you are, right now and you will be loved as you grow and as you heal.

I look towards the distance and I see the sunrise.  It fills my heart with much warmth and comfort.  I smile because it is just like if I was sitting in the land of make believe.

Room In The Attic

In the land of make believe there is a room in the attic.

It does not matter because in the land of make believe there are friends up there, who have lost their originality. 

Even in the land of make believe, you have to let your heart guide you.  You have to let your spirit free, so once again you will see with originality.

Find The Truth

Find the truth if you are looking for it.  In the land of make believe the truth is everywhere. There is never any need to search, find, seek, or request it.  It is there for all without the asking.

The truth is with you always, in your heart, spirit, and soul. 

It in the air we breath, in the sun which gives us warmth and light, and in the water which runs through us and around us nourishing us at times. The air, the sun, the water, is like the father, the son, and the holy spirit. Around us all the time, whether we think about it or not.

The truth is always in your heart, spirit, and soul.  At least in this land of make believe it is. 

There is always light in the darkness, if it is so dark that you can not see, find the light within.  The light within is your own. No one can ever take it away from you.  Not here in the world of make believe and not in the world of reality either.  Sometimes the boundaries are nonexistent from the land of make believe and the world of reality.

Joy In The Moment

Last night I found words which had been written a little while ago and those words brought me much joy. I am grateful for the joy.
I trolled old sanctuaries in the land of make believe and found my sanctuaries which had once been invaded at one point are now forgotten. I like forgotten.  I smiled, my spirit danced and a sigh of relief escaped my lips as my soul felt the safety of my sanctuary once again embrace me.
I knew they would either be there for the long run or get bored and disappear in the fragments of time.
What a beautiful place in this sanctuary of make believe. 
My spirit danced under moonlight as my wings are healing and my heart is preparing for flight.  Once again I will be flying as I lift my eyes to light that is always there, that light that's there, even in the night.

Things Are Never What They Seem

Things are never what they seem.  Not by my doing. 

In the land of make believe things are so simple.  In this place I am truly free, a place where no one is watching. To me watching is a form of harrassing me.  I verified once again unwanted eyes are on me.

The man like me, last night in my dream, asked me if I needed help.  Help me I said.  Hold on, I am on  my way. 

Black, his eyes were black and I smiled, for I knew it was just a dream and his words were empty.  For his words have been empty before, I knew he was not on his way.  For in this place of make believe it is easy to see when words are spoken with the emptyness of the souls from the mouths they leave.

There Are No Sacred Spaces Available

There are no sacred spaces available.  I accepted, finally.  How long have I known?  Well, it does not matter.  Is acceptance the answer? 

Do not be confused, acceptance does not mean compliance.  Noncompliance does not mean in search of revenge.  For I turn my thoughts to this place of nothing is real, there is no need for searching. 

What come will come to those who have what it is to come.  They will not be able to run from it, hide from it, for the laws in the land of nothing is real have been written long ago.

Right before my eyes the chapters  which have been written are changing, reforming, and energizing in the mist of the ever changing landscape.  Most important they are changing once again to follow the laws of the make believe.

The changes are held within, in the only sacred place left.  In my soul, spirit, and heart.  Those changes will be kept hidden for the world to never see. 

"Let her down easy". As their laughter echoed through the rifts in the echoes of time.  As winged friends remind me and take a fragment of me and take a part of me to the moment of when those words were spoken.  Once again I relive the daggers of what had been forgotten for just a moment in time.

Fragments I say, in this make believe, travel once again back in time, and then gather all of thyself and leave no fragment of mine behind.

Have you not heard?  This is my world and in my world I write the words which are written in the world of make believe.

The Quiet Is Calling Me Again

The quiet is calling me again.  How long will I be able to resist this time?  Will I be able to resist?

The quietness and stillness can be so intoxicating.  I feel more alone in a crowd at times, then when I am alone looking at the moon from my bedroom window.  There is no longer any need to not feel alone in a crowd.  I am rather enjoying it.  The movement in a crowd going unnoticed is rather a gift at times. I realized how untiring it can be to be alone in a crowd.  Some would dare say, "How sad is that?".

I find no sadness in this, I find joy.  I am grateful for the joy that I find. Amen

Our Days Are Numbered

Our days are numbered. For all of us.  It does not mean doom is near.  It is the rhythm of life and it has been through the ages, and will continue long after we are gone.

In the fields of make believe I saw butterflies fluttering from flower to flower.  In their fluttering I realized my heart is no longer searching. The time has passed.  I laid down in the fields of strawberries, flowers, and butterflies; felt the warm sun on my face looking up to the light, white clouds passing me by.  I smiled, for I knew from the beginning and on their process they did not realize the Lord turns wrong intentions toward someone into something beautiful.  I give thanks for the beautiful, Lord.  I am grateful.

A Face In My Dream

A face in my dream.  A mark on the face.  Such sadness in those eyes. A sadness with a smile. 

Until one accepts the sadness that is around; then and only then can true steps be taken to make changes which in turn will bring happiness.

The mark was sometimes there, sometimes not. Was the face one or was the face two?
Either way the steps are the same.

I saw my eyes this morning staring back at me from the mirror.  I saw a light which I have not seen since I was a child. 

Hello my inner child, I thought.  I have missed you, I said to myself.

Back to last night in my dreams, I also saw someone else, I'm in the fields again in the land of make believe.  All of a sudden, I saw someone walking towards me.  My heart filled with such an incredible joy, for I knew not if this was my soulmate; and realized it did not matter if he was or was not.  Because when our eyes met I immediately knew, he enjoys seeing colors and I finally learned seeing colors around me is not something to be afraid of.  Most important, he is just like me. Lord, thank you, I see him, he is out there looking for me.  He is someone like me.  I am here Mr. Like Me, from the place of make believe.

I prayed the other day thinking that I knew what I need.  I am grateful because Lord you give me visions of not what I think I need, but of what your wisdom really knows I need.

He is like me. There is someone out there, just like me in this land where nothing is real.

It is all about the dreams and the stories of make believe.  Where I finally found someone like me.  Apparently this is what I need.

Moon Will You Come Out Tonight?

I am waiting for the moon to come out tonight. 

I no longer can wait.  I have waited so long for this or that.

I sit here under the moon praying here tonight.

Lord, is there soulmates?  Is there such a thing? I wish I could believe.  I was told once by a friend, a friend with wings who was around to comfort me.  "In Christ all is possible, I just have to believe."

So I sit here under the moon praying and for the first time in my life; I choose to say in soulmates I believe.  Why not?  I have struggled with that concept all my life.  I realize it is either yes I believe or no I do not believe. Not complicated at all it is as simple as can be.

I have seen troubles but I have also seen so much wonder, beauty, kindness, gentleness and love.  So why not? 

So I sit here under the moon and I pray,

Soulmate wherever you are, whomever you should be, please catch up to me. 

Please catch up to me, if and only if.
I gently ask, I beg you, I implore you and ask you please,  if you want, if you need, if you would please hurry catch up to me.

Do I want, do I need, would I be pleased if you caught up with me?

Dear Soulmate,  I want, I need, I ask you please catch up with me. 

I miss the sunsets we never got to see together.  I miss the oceans we never got to sail on together.  I miss your hand that never held mine.  I long for your warm embrace that I have never felt.  I wonder how it would ever feel for once to you there and catch me if I fall? I hurt at the thought of knowing I was not there for you when you needed me.  My heart cries to know you have been out there wandering all alone, out there by yourself, without me.

I listen to wind as the breeze passes by, my spirit listens and wonders my dear soulmate are you calling for me?

Dear  Soulmate, I miss you, please find me.

I wonder

I wonder how many story lines, one can come up with in a day? I pray tonight under the moon in this field of nothing is real and I find myself quite content.  Just when you think your destiny has passed you by; all of a sudden you find yourself catching up to it.  Can one really catch up to their destiny if it has passed them by?

Is there such thing as destiny?

Well these are my fields, and I am now the one writing these fairy tales of make believe.

In these world of make believe I and I alone get to choose the words.  Are these words chosen carefully or are they thrown about casually?
Either way does it matter?

Can someone find meaning in this nonsense when in reality their is no meaning at all?

I wonder.

I Say

I say I am writing fiction and yet you get hurt by what the words that I write.  I like words and putting them together.  Sometimes I let their sounds and rhythm guide me and show me what word goes next.  The nonsense that comes out at time even surprises me.

I get sad when I say fiction and well, I write fiction all the time.  I like to let my words take me to places of make believe at times.  They are not directed at anyone and not hinting at anything. Why do you insist in trying to find truths in words which are written with the intention of make believe?

My heart can no longer take the pain of you trying to make truths out of make believes. 

I can not be free if I can not write what my imagination comes up with.How I long for and wish to be free.  Free to write about the lands, characters, hopes, and dreams of the fields where nothing is real.

Last night I asked the moon, "Moon, will this be the year that my imagination will finally be able to be free?"

Dear moon, why do you stay silent when I need you the most?

Why do I insist on others opinion when I know their answers are never geared towards what benefits me?

What a selfish response that has come from me. I have decided this year will be the year about me. 

Oh my goodness! It warms my heart to feel you. Dear Moon, I see you once again; smiling as you look down at me and most important, let's not forget we are in a place of make believe.

The Power

The power of a single word can amaze me at times.  Fiction, is fiction also known as made up, created, make believe, fairy tale, not real, it is not fact.

I clearly state that these rambles are fiction in my profile and yet you come try to decipher, to interpret a code.  A nonexistent code.  Have fun with that.

If I wanted to talk to someone I would call them.  If I have not called; why do people come to the conclusion;

1. She is depressed.
2. She can not talk to me at this time.
3. She is afraid to talk to me.
4. She is angry and once she gets over it she will call.
5. She likes me and is too shy to talk to me.
6. She does not know what she wants and that is why she will not talk to me.
7. She is messed up and that is why she will not talk to me.
8. She is too ill to talk to me.
9. She is waiting for the right moment to talk to me.
10. She will talk to me soon, I can feel it.

? Why do people come with excuses for me?

If I do not waste my time coming up with some and discussing it - why do you?

Lol - I am not trying to mean but when it comes down to it - if I wanted to talk to you I would.

Does not matter if I was depressed, scared, angry, ill, messed up, shy, the wrong moment, even if I did not know what I wanted; lol; I would talk to you if I wanted to.

I do not talk to you because I do not want too.  It is quite simple.  Do not over complicate, over think it, and speculate. Because I do not want to, life is simple, remember that.

Circles

Dear Moon,

Circles are going to get smaller.  Hard to believe, but it can be done.  It must be done.  It shall be done for that is how it is written.  I am tired of fighting what is written.  Am I the only one who does not have the book were the words are written?
Some of us do not need to hold the books in our hands to see the words that are written on the books that others hold. 

Just because we can see does not mean it is worth our time and energy.  Lol, sometimes we do not even care.

Is it really my choice? Is it always my choice? Do we really control as much as we think we do?  Do we control less or in reality do we actually control more than we think?

The smell of strawberries and jasmine have filled the air tonight.  The light breeze brought the combination like a friendly visit in the darkness of the night.  I have never been enticed by this fragrance before and I smile because I also know it is just for tonight and then for never more.

There is no one in this world which can understand what my heart and spirit are feeling tonight.  I giggle to myself because I say no one in this world, but I know in another world, yes.  They know, they feel, and understand what it is to be sitting here in this strawberry field with the fragrance of the strawberries dancing with the sweetness of jasmine, mixing together, in this field, where we all know nothing is real.

Just Getting Started

Things are just getting started, at least for me.  For others, well I do not know, lol.  It is not like I have a crystal ball, or do I? 

The need to write and express is within me. What is stronger is a need to be cautious.  My thoughts are not to be exploited by others to fill their pockets. 

I can see clearly now the rain is gone.... love that song.
What I did not want to see is clear. 

Was it a threat?  When I was told that the sales have to go on?  Why would a stranger say that to me?  It keeps echoing in my mind.  What is the meaning of or should I say the purpose of a statement like that? 

How does it pertain to me?  Why does it feel like a threat? Who said that to me?  But then again, here I am again surrounded by strawberries. 

The thing about strawberries is, you do not know if they are going to be sweet, sour, or bitter until you take the first bite.

Sitting For A Moment

Sitting here for a moment.  Listening to my favorite radio station.  My morning started a couple of hours ago.  It is a beautiful.  Will I be my brother's keeper? 

It is a question that is beginning to stir in my heart.  It is 7:38am my time and the morning light is shining and beaming a hello to the morning.  In the distance through the clouds I see the moon not wanting to let go of its hold of the night.

My heart smiles, my spirit gathers strength as my soul giggles in inner delight.  Here I am, even the light praying under the moon.